I Miss My Sears

I’m in no good humor I tell you. None at all.

We had the best Sears Hardware store near our house. It was a real man’s paradise where one could get lost in hammers, saws, Carhart Shirts, duct tape, and telescopic magnetic gadgets to pick up bolts fallen behind refrigerators.

Anyway that oasis closed about three months ago; I am assuming from pressure from a nearby new Lowe’s with all its fancy lighting, clean floors, and helpful staff who never seem to be able to direct you to what you’re looking for – unless it’s paint. They all seem to know where the paint is.

I like Lowe’s well enough; it’s okay. They usually have most everything you need and give a ten percent military discount, but I loved the Sears Hardware for picking up odds and ends.

This morning I was working on putting a new doggie door in my backdoor. The old one was kind of ratty and this is a new fangled door with special weather insulation magic (if you believe in that kind of thing).

Anyway about three quarters of the way through, I realized the enclosed nylon bolt wouldn’t be long enough. They were three inches long and I needed at least three and a half inches.

This is not the first time I’ve encountered this doggy door distraction. I would previously run off to Sears, rifle through the “specialty screw” drawers, get a few six inch stainless steel ones, use them, and snap off the excess.

Easy Peasy!

With no Sears to rifle through, I hopped in my wife’s car (which was on empty BTW) and went over to Lowe’s.

Where I once frolicked in row upon row of screws and bolts, I was now confined to just one wall of sliding draws and antiseptic plastic packages of bolts. No grease pencils, or tiny brown paper bags.

What a drag.

I hunted and looked and couldn’t find the right thing. There were none to be had. It was very sad.

I eventually picked up a couple of stainless steel bolts that were a bit to wide, but long enough. I figured I’d go home drill out the plastic holes in the doggy doorframe and use these.

By the time I got home the cold I’m fighting had the better of me and I pretty much through my hands up in disgust and sneezed my way into finishing it tomorrow.

I drift from my point. What would have been a ten minute run to Sears Hardware – where manly men go to play in endless drawers of fasteners – turn into a 45 minute odyssey in a family store. Yech!

My Kingdom for a dusty bolt bin.


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